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Teach Your Children With Love and They Will Learn

Our children, little sponges, little creatures that we love so much and we display that love in so many ways. We want to show them the world and all the wonderful things that make our world! The birds and the fish and all the animals small and large, the flowers and the trees with so many candies they produce year after year effortless and with grace. We want to teach them with love. We want to teach them everything that we possibly can because we love them so much. How can we do our best and succeed? How can we make learning a fabulous together time with our children? Is it even possible? Yes it is and it can be such a pleasure not only for the child but for the parent as well. We have to remember that every child is a very special being, with gifts and talents all their own. They are very valuable and so unique, and they carry on their backs the precious DNA of both families. The marvelous blueprint that gives us direction as to what kind of people we will be. So take a look around and start paying attention to the talented and no so talented members of both families. You will be able to recognize early in a child's life what excites them, what lights their face, what makes them happy what they love to do.

That is the easy part, the difficult part is when they have to learn imperative things like reading, math and so many more and they just don't like it..do we continue to teach them with love? What can we do if they don't find pleasure in reading? Our love for them will make us find the strength and patience to endure and we will succeed! Here are a few ideas that can make it easier. They really learn by example, if they see your love for reading, and you are surrounded by books most probably they will try to imitate you. Have books and magazines available on topics they like, start with short things to read. Try not to make reading a chore, because the whole point of reading is to find out stuff and to be entertained. They will learn most everything when we make a game out of it, for instance if a book has dialog why not read with them and pretend you are the characters in the book by impersonating them with the different voices, like a little play. How about a little reading nook in a quiet part of the house just for them with all their books, their favorite chair and a little basket with delicious healthy snacks that is a way to teach them with love Talking about snacks and food in general, I love to teach children how to cook and bake. To watch them play with the different ingredients and to ask so many questions gives me great pleasure.Ofcource I keep it simple and basic.

Cooking can open children's minds to the world around them and teach them that there is great value in other cultures. How about if once a week we try to cook something from a different country! Post the day of the happening on the board and ask the children to bring a little information about that particular country and get a little geography lesson at the same time. One main ingredient when we want to succeed in reaching their hearts is to talk with them and not at them, also please pretend you don't know everything and you will win their hearts, isn't that what we want??? Here is the gist of the mater, children are very smart more than we give them credit for, they will asses a situation and if they are happy they will be eager to learn with you and they will remember!! Teaching them with love will keep them coming for more and that for me is mission accomplished!!!!! Litsa with love

About Litsa Bolontzakis
Children's book and cookbook author Litsa Bolontzakis is an expert on Greek cooking and that culture's easy, simple way of life. Her desire is to help other families learn from her culture how to appreciate the simple things in life and grow to enjoy the seasons and the gifts they bring. http://hummingbirdpublications.com

By Litsa Bolontzakis

Boys Themed Birthday Invitations Can Add Spice In Your Birthday Celebrations

These boys themed birthday invitations are great fun, especially if the designs and the colors that are used in the invitation are bright and colorful. The boys would definitely have their own tastes and preferences and if the parents can understand that and reflect his favorite designs in the birthday invitations, then it would be a double delight to the kid.

Not only the boy would relish it, even the guests would really love to have a look at the card. The themes, patterns and prints of these boys' themed birthday invitations are many and it is up to the boy to select his choice from the wide variety of options that are available. These invitations are also available in variety of colors. The most popular among all these invitations is the seasonal themes which truly depicts a beautiful background.

Whatever designs and whatever color one chooses, one thing for sure is that these boys themed birthday invitations would ultimately charm your guests and friends in a big way. The colors in these invitations are really bright and the patterns are staggeringly fabulous and appealing.

Birthday always starts with inviting the guests and friends to the party. There is no better way of inviting them other than these themed invitations which would be really eye catching. Once these guests see the themed invitations, it would automatically motivate them to attend the party. Such is the power and attraction of these invitations.

The ultimate objective of any parent is to make their child happy and satisfied. These invitations go a long way in enhancing the satisfaction levels of the kid and it would make him feel that the celebration of his birthday is complete. He would also feel in his inner mind that the occasion has been made really special by his parents.

If you are really worried about the cost factor as you would be spending much on food, drinks and decoration on the birthday party, then such parents still have the option of having these themed invitations self made. One just needs to spend few minutes in creating these beautiful invitations. Everyone in the family can try making out some design with the help of others.

You need not necessarily have to buy these themed invitations. Once, everyone in the family participate in doing such work it would really be like a family get together along with the normal fun which the family will have while planning out the design to be imprinted on the cards.

There are many types of invitations that are available. Let us have a look at some of those.

Birthday invitation for boys

Birthday party is once a year occasion and one has to make it really special as these moments do not come up time and again. The most popular invitations include the Cakeosaurus, Cupcake candle, Farm friends, Baseball and jersey, Football and jersey, Game time, Delivered Fresh and many others. If you do not get the design that you wished for, then you still have the option of getting the invitations personalized.

Personalized invitations are recommended especially when the kid is celebrating his 1st birthday. The parents generally like to add some special touches to the invitation to make it look unique and different. They want it personalized mainly because of the fact that the parents would be celebrating the birthday of their son for the very first time.

Transformers invitation

These invitations are perfect when the theme of the invitation is transformers based. They are basically available in two versions. One is the non photo version and the other is the photo version. Boys can easily relate with this character as the transformers character is quite popular with the younger generation. The photo in these invitations depicts a robot.

These invitations can be custom made as well, if people find it difficult in getting these invitations. You can have your desired color and pattern. The area where these invitations can be made special is by involving the guests as well in the party where the guests are asked to put on the costumes of the transformers. It would really be an enthralling and a different experience for the guests too.

Bakugan birthday invitations

For friends and family photo invitations are considered as the best. The photo in these invitations completely sets the tone for the party. Bakugan is a famous Japanese animation series. These series of animation is really popular with the kids. What better way than having the photo of Bakugan imprinted on the birthday invitations? These invitations are basically custom made and are available in various styles and designs.

The shirt of the kid can also be personalized with the photo of Bakugan. This will really add some fun and frolic in the party.

Ben 10 birthday invitations

Ben 10 is quite a famous character among the kids. Many kids would love to have the character of Ben 10 on their invitation cards. It would make the kids feel as if they are portraying this animated character. This can not only be custom made on the invitations but you can have them on the dress and the birthday cake as well. This invitation is a fantastic way to keep your son interested in the birthday celebrations.

Camouflage invitations

These are true colorful invitations in which the design of the written matter perfectly matches with the background that has been projected. The background really blends well with the invitation pattern, hence the name Camouflage is associated with these invitations. You can have the color of your choice and select the one which you feel is the best.

Construction birthday invites

This invitation is specially used for kids who are interested in the motor vehicles. In this designs of cars and trains are custom made to go with the birthday invitation. The very picture of having your favorite vehicle in the invitation would excite the kid.

Hot wheels birthday invitations

In these invitations you can see images of sports cars. This invitation is especially useful for kids who are interested in racing and speedy vehicles.

By Nowshad Devasamparambil

Education In America: Are Our Children Really Prepared For The Future?

My child failed a math test today.

It was interesting the thoughts and feelings that came up with this. Now, granted, she's in the 2nd grade, so what's the big deal? But, I have to say, a litany of guilt, despair and my own insecurities rose to the surface, "Was I preparing my child well enough for life?"

This thought gave way to other thoughts about how we prepare our children for life. Certainly, a well-rounded education is the foundation from which all of us spring forth. It is good and I am indebted to the many incredible teachers who in my life inspired me to do greater things, and have ignited within me the fiery passion for perpetual learning!

I have also been privileged to have the most amazing teachers in all of my children's lives. These are not just ordinary people. They are super-human, extraordinary beings who not only teach our children, but love them, challenge them, nurture them, kiss their boo-boos and provide an environment where a child learns how to learn.

They are my heroes.

But, sometimes I wonder if the outline of our educational plan is somewhat lacking in preparation for real life. I watched the movie "Easy A" with my older daughter. It was delightful and insightful and really tackled some of the hot spots teens have to navigate today. The main character's parents were hilarious! They were loving, supportive and playful, but instilled great confidence in their daughter and nurtured her ability to handle her own problems.

There was a scene where the mother was speaking to the younger child and he announced that he received an "A" on his spelling test. She replied, "That's great, honey, but everything has spellcheck these days." It was hilarious... but TRUE! Not that I am advocating that we do not teach our children how to spell (although with prevalence of text language, we might need to step this up even more!) but maybe some of our time should be spent educating them about the dangers of posting things on Facebook that could haunt them the rest of their lives. The drunken dance on top of a table is funny now, but not when you want to run for a political office or already in office. Yea, those pictures go viral... ask Senator Weiner.

We might be educating them, but are they learning what they need to - to survive?

Maybe we might want to spend time showing them how real life works - signing contracts really do obligate you, they aren't kidding. Oh, and the credit card isn't free money - you will have to pay it back at sometime. Oh, and get this - they charge you for borrowing that money. Perhaps, we should spend some time on interpersonal relationships (and no, that does not involve texting or the social network). I worry that our kids do not know how to relate to one another... (OMG, frowny face emoticon).

Choosing a career is a daunting task. My daughter is a sophomore in college and has changed her major twice. My stepdaughter did the same. These are smart girls, mind you - both graduated summa cum laude. It's not that they didn't know what they wanted to do. What they "wanted to do" and the degree they chose did not match.

I have learned many college students do not know what they want to do because they haven't seen what it looks like in the "real world." Being a journalist in the real world looks way different than writing stories. Maybe if we spent some time exposing them to real life experience - maybe internships in high-school or the ability to take two or three courses in areas of interest in high-school that give them a "feel" for what that particular field would look like, they might be better prepared. I do not know the solution, but it seems one should at least be a topic of discussion.

We give them the keys to the car, a "Smart Phone" and a credit card yet few can cook a meal for themselves, do their own laundry or balance their accounts.

I read the other day that 80% of 4-year-olds can run a phone app. They just can't tie their shoes.

That just doesn't add up.

To learn more, download a FREE copy of "The Life Survival Guide" for kids and learn more about how YOU can be an advocate for your child by going to www.monsterproofyourchild.com/info/.

Lisa Smith is a the founder of www.monsterproofyourchild.com, certified neurotherapist and neurodevelopmentalist and mother of a child who has been cured of autism!

Attention editors, publishers, marketers, bloggers and webmasters:
Feel free to copy and paste this article. You must include attribution to the article and it's author (s) and the following short paragraph in the same font size and visibility as the main article: This article appears courtesy of Lisa Smith's "Tattle Tails" - a weekly newsletter from monsterproofyourchild.com. Linking monsterproofyourchild.com to this website.

By LisaMarie Smith

Babies Having Babies

As the youth of America's interest in the reality show "Teen Mom" rises, so does the teen pregnancy rate. The show portrays the happily ever after of pregnant high school couples. This has teen girls wanting to follow in their footsteps. They see it as an opportunity to be on t.v., keep their boyfriends and fill a void in their lives. As they plot out their fairy tale dream, they do not stop to think about the risks that lay ahead.

One subject you rarely hear addressed on these reality teen shows is the health risks brought on by teen pregnancy. How does growing a human life inside a body that is still growing itself effect a young lady? We all know teen life is full of late nights, stress, non-nutritional foods, and hormone imbalances. Throw the turbulence of teen pregnancy into that and the risks sky rocket!

The first signs of pregnancy often go unnoticed in teen girls. They do not usually keep regular track of their periods, so they do not realize when they have missed one. Teens are often run down and tired, so fatigue is no red flag. They are always on an emotional roller coaster so mood swings are a normal daily occurrence. Teens are usually in denial and have a feeling of invincibility, so unless their pregnancy is expected, it will go undetected. Morning sickness will often be the first noticeable sign of trouble.

The lack of prenatal care is the is the #1 cause for health problems in pregnant teens. Once they know they are pregnant, they often don't tell their parents right away. The first few months of prenatal care are critical. Many teens do not see a doctor until these months have passed. Medical problems and complications can go undetected. They are also missing the benefits of prenatal vitamins. These, combined with folic acid, are key in helping prevent certain birth defects.

Pregnant teens are at higher risk for pregnancy induced hypertension. Preeclampsia can combine with dangerously high blood pressure,causing the mothers hands, feet and face to swell. This can cause organ damage and premature birth. The only cure for preeclampsia is delivering the baby, no matter what stage the pregnancy is in.

STD's are another medical concern among all teens, but have an increased risk in ones who are pregnant and their babies. The importance of condom use critically increases during pregnancy. STD's can rise through the cervix and infect the uterus and the growing baby inside it.

Teenage pregnancy also can cause anemia in the still growing body of a young lady. Anemia is fatigue brought on by a low red blood count. Pregnant teens need to be sure to eat adequate protein and take iron supplements if needed. They will be tested for anemia at their prenatal visits.

Placenta previa is a major risk for pregnant teens. This is a complication that occurs when the placenta grows on the opening of the cervix. The cervix is the area where the baby exits the womb during delivery. If this area is blocked, bleeding can occur, making it necessary to have an emergency c-section.

Babies having babies is something we will always see. Teaching our children about safe sex and self respect are our weapons against teen pregnancy. We need to have open communication and trusting relationships with our children. There will always be pregnant teens, so we as a society need to make sure the resources are available for them to seek prenatal care in the early stages of their pregnancy, to help ensure both children are healthy.

For information on Family Health and nutrition topics visit http://myfamilyplate.com

By Angie Valentine

How Anti Bullying Programs Can Help Stop Bullying

Anti bullying programs may not be able to guarantee zero bullying in schools but they can help reduce it. Some of the benefits of having an anti bullying program in a school include:

Increased Awareness

The first step is in admitting that there is a problem but before bullying can be acknowledged, it has to be known. More often than not, a bully gets away with their actions because nobody is aware that they are, in fact, bullying. Anti bullying programs can help to raise the awareness amongst students and parent of what bullying is, how to spot it and what to do about it.

Improvement in School Policy

One of the most important things that comes out of having an anti bullying program in a school is the fact that the school needs to review its policy. Often, because the school doesn't have a clear policy, bullies get away with their behavior and those students who are targeted don't tell.

In reviewing their policy, hopefully the school will come out with a clear, concise and usable anti bullying policy which they can then present to their students, parents and teachers. And instead of being put in a filing cabinet for safekeeping is a document that helps shapes the way things are dealt with at the school. This also gives the students the message that the school is serious about dealing with bullying.

Empowered Students

Bullying usually doesn't get noticed by adults because students targeted are too scared to tell anyone. Peer pressure, self-doubt and outright fear are just a few of the reasons why they will never tell. With the right programs in place and effective support from the school community and parents, a student that is targeted can be given the tools to help them to get help. They need not fear repercussions from the bully as there is a process in place to help stop this.

Students can also be empowered as bystanders - so that if they see bullying take place they are able to speak out and help stop it, or get help from an adult.

Involved Parents

Anti bullying programs also need the support and involvement of parents. Parents need to know how to help their child if they are being bullied or if they are a bully. They need to know how to contact the school but also understand how the school will deal with the issue, and what their process is for helping not just the target but also the perpetrator. Parents need to feel that they are involved in the process but also that the school is seriously committed to the NO BULLY message.

For an anti bullying program to be successful, everyone needs to be onboard and involved. There needs to be a high level of commitment so that this is not just a flash in the pan, but the school is committed to becoming a NO BULLY school. Running a program needs the help and participation of the entire community in order to help stop bullying in its tracks.

By AJ Mior

How to Find Out If Your Child Is Being Bullied at School

As a parent, one of your biggest fears may be to find out that your child or teen is being bullied. It may be even harder to quell your fears with everything the media comes out with - news of kids whose beatings are uploaded to YouTube or who resort to committing suicide rather than endure another day of bullying. So how can you tell whether your child is being bullied, as they may not automatically tell you what is happening?

So what are some of the things you need to look out for? Remember these 'A' adjectives as describe some of the signs of bullying.

Aloof

If your cheerful and outgoing teen suddenly shuts down and shuts you out, you should begin to ask yourself if they might be being bullied or if something else is bothering them. A bullied child may become unresponsive and secretive at home. They may choose to not participate as normal in family moments and may eventually stop interacting altogether. Take notice if they start locking themselves in their room all the time and especially if they are on the computer all the time. Spending so much time alone - they might feel like they are not getting any support and start thinking about taking drastic measures.

Angry

A child or teen who is the target of bullying may start to get into fights with their siblings. They may get mad over little things and be constantly on edge. They become constantly grumpy and may be a bit depressed. You may find it difficult to distinguish between teenage angst from bully anger though, so this is where it helps be able to sit down and have a chat.

Allergic to School

You may find that you child starts to say that they don't want to go to school...and there will often be a reason for this - as most kids hate schoolwork but they will still go to school because of friends, sports and school activities that interest them.

Abused

If your child continually comes home with bruises - then you need to start to take notice and perhaps even ask how they are getting these. If they start to do their own laundry, check their closet. Ripped shirts are a sure sign of something being wrong. If they explain bruises away, try to remember if they were that clumsy before.

If you find out that they are being hit you will need to call the school authorities and report that your child is being bullied.

Altered

Bullying will take a toll emotionally and you may see changes. They may look tired due to a lack of sleep. They may lose weight and not really eat a lot. Keep a close eye on their clothes and body.

If you suspect your child or teen is a target of bullying, get involved. Keep yourself updated on the things they do at school or with his friends. Ask them what the highlight of their day was and what parts of their day they did not like. Also talk to your child about what they are doing online as this is most likely another important part of their world. The best thing you can do is to keep the communication lines open and if you feel that something is not right, talk to them...and then show them your support, love and help.

By AJ Mior

Teenage Stress and Why Your Teen Is Lashing Out

Forget for a moment you have a mortgage, a job, and complex relationships that take up time and energy. Set aside the worries and anxieties consuming your adult brain, and try to remember what life was like when you were a teenager.

Is it easy or hard? Do you have good memories or terrible ones?

Chances are you have romanticized your teen years into more manageable memories, or maybe those years were so horrible you've cast them out of existence.

For the most part parents have forgotten how stressful the teen years can be. And why not? Do we really want to relive the embarrassments, the trauma and the drama? The sooner we can pretend we were always well adjusted, and well liked the sooner our lives can really begin.

By the time we have children of our own recollections of those turbulent times have faded into fuzzy memories that hardly resemble the truth.

Have we really forgotten what it was like to be a teenager? We act like we have.

We punish the disobedience. We lecture the attitudes. We mourn the loss of innocence. We treat their pain as something minor. Perhaps in the comparison to adult concerns it doesn't register on the same scale as something worth worrying over.

If that is the case then we need a new scale. The life of a teenager is consuming, full of drama, and passion, and stress. What your teen is feeling and experiencing is important to them and therefore needs to be important to us.

The next time your teen lashes out, remember how difficult being a teenager really can be.

Top Five Reasons Your Teen Is Stressed

    * Relationships

It's not just members of the opposite sex that cause your teen added worry. Friendships can be fickle, and at during these years friendships are the most important part of your child's life. It is the acceptance and feeling of being understood that helps our teens cope with the day to day challenges. When their relationships are suffering chances are the entire household suffers.

    * School

Teens understand how important education is. We lecture them enough about it. To get ahead in life they don't just have to stay in school, they have to do well in school. Doing well in school requires hard work and commitment. If they do not have an adult to invest in their 'story' and encourage them along the way chances are they will lose forward momentum and end up behind.

    * Extra-Curricular Activities

Is your child on a sports team? Do they play an instrument? Are they part of a club or after-school program? While these things provide creative outlets and physical activity there is added pressure to perform and excel.

    * Bullying

Fitting in and being accepted is paramount to a teenager. Sometimes it doesn't happen. Sometimes kids are cruel. There are new avenues for bullies these days. With the connective power of the internet cyber-bullies have endless ways to make our teens miserable.

    * Purpose

Teenagers need a story, something to hang onto when school becomes difficult, peer pressure more intense, and life just too stressful. Without purpose everyone withers. Without a goal our efforts become pointless. This is as true for our teens as it is for us.

The next time your teen lashes out, take a deep breath and ask yourself why. Sometimes all they need is someone who is not just listening but truly hears them.

Karen Pasqualucci is a passionate, lifelong learner. She is an author, artist, entrepreneur, internationally accomplished speaker/trainer, a third degree black belt in Taijitsu and a homeschool mom of three. She shares her newest insights on her blog at http://DoodleMeanings.com and gives away free Mandalas simply to make you as addicted as she is to the pleasures of mandalas :) Come and get 'em!

By Karen Pasqualucci

That's Boring: Why Classic Literature Is No Longer Relevant to Tech-Savvy Teens (or Not)

English teachers and librarians frequently lament the disinclination their students feel toward classic literature-specifically, anything written before the twentieth century. Not only, do they believe, that today's young adults need the short-snappy-immediate prose (if one can call it thus) of cell phone texts, but they will no longer read classic literature on their own, for pleasure's sake, unless it's assigned-and even then, teachers are forced to test against Cliffs Notes and scan for the internet for proof of plagiarized papers. With random predictions forecasting the doom of paper and the downfall of traditional libraries, is it a waste of time to subject teens to the likes of Homer and other historic authors during this Information Age when bite-sized information is the rule of the day?

For many students, who do not hesitate to complain, the language of past writers is too hard. Since people no longer speak or write the way Shakespeare and Jane Austen did, it makes little sense for them to study these archaic modes of communication. After all, they could be developing Power Point presentations which will surely be something more relevant to their futures. Of course, the "too hard" theory is something English teachers should never succumb to or accept when they rush to defend centuries-old literature. The vast majority of students may not go on to become experts in Medieval Literature, but they can each benefit from the self-discipline a reading of Othello, Beowulf, or Crime and Punishment provides.

Though surely, self-discipline is a timeless trait that goes beyond a study of English Literature; it could be gotten from a myriad of other disciplines such as Geometry, Computer Programming, Graphic Design, etc... So, getting to the question of relativity-are works of classic literature still relevant to high school students today when, as statistics show, they are reading record-breaking modern texts like Harry Potter and the Twilight series? And certainly people around the world (and we may as well talk globally in this day and age) are reading the 175,000 books that publishers are publishing annually; they certainly wouldn't be publishing books of any sort if no one bought them.

A portion of these 175,000 published books are paperbacks-reprints of successful books, many of which happen to be classics (at least for now). But rather than veer into the virtual world of statistics, it may be insightful to revisit some classics to check out their value first hand, or at least through the lens of this article. The following classics continue to be relevant in terms of content and more to people today.

Moby Dickby Herman Melville symbolizes the dread of teens stuck in American Literature classes everywhere. Why, when none of them are like to go a-whaling should they spend weeks reading and discussing this particular work that seems so far removed from their contemporary lives. There could be a discussion of why the novel is singularly important to the foundation of American Literature, but the simple relevance the novel has can be summed up as a study of good and evil, humankind's relationship with nature, and the need to interact successfully with fellow mankind. Its themes are timeless and no one has yet to convey them as profoundly as Melville did with this particular work.

In 1995 South Carolina-born Susan Smith was convicted of murdering her three-year-old and fourteen-month -old sons by strapping them in the backseat of a car and driving to a ramp on a lake where she released the brake and watched as the car deliberately plunged into the water with her children and sank. Theories for the horrendous murders abounded, but a murderous discontent and a new man were in part of her life at the time of the incident. In 431 B.C. the ancient Greek tragedian Euripides first produced the drama Medea. The character of Medea does the unthinkable-she kills her own children to rob her cheating husband of his offspring. Horror, in its inexplicable guises, is still a part of human civilization and how much better to plummet its motivations than within the harmless pages of a book? And why not begin at the beginning of Western Literature with a poet who catalogued human motivation like no one else.

Teen pregnancy is not a new concept; had you asked Thomas Hardy in the late nineteenth century he could tell you all about Tess and how a youthful indiscretion resulted in pregnancy which indirectly led to her own untimely death. Nor is Hardy's text an indictment against promiscuity; indeed, he favored Tess among all his classic heroines. Instead, Tess of the D'Urbervilles, written at the end of the Victorian era, is an indictment against society, religion, and the people in Tess's life who shunned her with their morality, a shunning which resulted in her downfall. It's true the Victorians, even the late Victorians like Hardy, tended to be verbose and employ the English vocabulary on a grand scale, but little can rival the power of Hardy's heroine except, perhaps, Nathaniel Hawthorne who wrote a little American tale of his own fallen woman titled The Scarlet Letter. Should teen girls be thinking about the ramifications of unplanned pregnancy in the twenty-first century? Millions are spent on educating them; there's no reason that Hardy and Hawthorne couldn't help.

But before this examination turns into a discussion of fallen literary women, consider the relativity of a character like Homer's Achilles who appears in the Iliad. Forget the fact that he's the son of a goddess (Thetis, Greek goddess of the Sea); today's fantasy-fed, vampire-loving teens will swallow that anyway. Achilles is a warrior sent to Troy to fight in the ten-year conflict it took to win back Helen, the Angelina Jolie of the ancient world. Achilles, in his grief over a fallen comrade, breaks the rules of warfare and damages his own sense of honor. With America currently at war in multiple locations, a study of Achilles is not only relevant, but possibly essential and possibly it always will be so long as peace remains an elusive state.

Luckily ancient Greek texts of the Iliad are adapted into English, but persnickety English teachers still require students to read Shakespeare in its original form. Its true writers no longer write in iambic pentameter, except by chance and even then it goes unnoticed, but the Bard's characters are as relative today as they ever were. For example, King Lear raises a passel of ungrateful daughters. Loyalty, treachery, villainy, loves-these are often at the heart of Shakespeare's plays and they never go out of style despite the language barrier. Once students get a handle on the language, more times than not, they become fascinated at the connection they have to history through this language and how the characters remind them of themselves and others.

And perhaps it comes down to that-the reading of others, others who have, thus far, stood the test of time. When teens read and discuss characters they make judgments that could and probably will influence their own judgments as adults. There are many quips and quotations that warn of the failure to understand history like those who fail to understand history are doomed to repeat it. Classic literature is relevant because it offers the opportunity for readers to empathize in depth, understand at length, and tune out of their own universe for a while. Tuning out of technology can bring calm, discipline, and refreshment to minds that seem to be born to multitask. Certainly one can cry out the modern relevance of a slew of classics from Pride and Prejudice to Moby Dick. Until kids develop their own taste for literature, it could be the situation could be likened to eating their vegetables-they need to do it because it's good for them.

By Moira G Gallaga

Parents, Attachment, and Kids

To say that a parent's attachment to his or her kids is strong may be a negative statement. Attachment is described as secure and insecure, so it is possible to have a strong attachment that is insecure. Insecure attachment descriptors reflect parental styles associated with the types of attachment: secure attachment with parental flexibility and stability, avoidant attachment with dismissive parenting, ambivalent attachment with preoccupied parents, and disorganized attachment with overwhelmed parents. Parental capacity is important to consider. Children build their nervous system and learn how to balance emotions, thoughts, and behavior through attachment. Parental capacity to attach to children can also change over time.

Avoidant attachment is reinforced from parental messages that emotions are not important in a child's self-identity and in making decisions. Thus, the child (and as an adult) may feel like he or she does not really matter. An avoidant person may even believe that emotions steer one into danger or disaster and are not to be trusted. So emotions are left out of daily interactions. It may be hard to comfort or connect with an avoidant person. A second type of avoidant attachment seeks to please a significant other and downgrade one's own needs because one can only accept emotions if they are not opposed by the significant other. This is a co-dependent relationship.

Ambivalent attachment patterns are derived from close connections that are not stable. The parent could be hot or cold. When cold, the parent may be preoccupied; it does not mean that the parent's love wavers. So fear may develop associated with closeness and connection, because closeness and connection could be lost. The child or adult in this case may crave intimacy but not want to ask for it. If intimacy does happen, this person may eventually find it stifling. The child or adult may then experience anger and would distance from the significant other, but then fear would overtake from being feeling alone. The pattern then becomes hot pursuit, but then cold distancing.

Disorganized or dysregulated attachment patterns stem from parents who are ruled by the "fight or flight" autonomic nervous system. Parents tend to be aggressive or controlling, stemming from fear. On the other hand, parents could be overwhelmed or a victim, again stemming from fear.

Secure attachments are stable patterns but do not have to be perfect. They stem from a parent's capacity at a particular place and time to recognize and value the emotions of a child, or to connect with what the child is doing. When the child comes to the parent, the parent in effect says to the child that the child is okay even when the child or parent is having negative emotions. The child is allowed to be separate from the parent, with the child's own set of valid emotions and self-confidence.

The author Dan Blair, LMFT, LCPC, NCPC is a marriage and family therapist, counselor, and divorce mediator with Blair Counseling and Mediation in Crystal Lake, Illinois.

We offer free articles on peaceful ways to resolve relationship issues to support life-long marriage and mimimize the harm from divorce through divorce mediation. We also address family and personal issues associated with depression, anxiety, anger management, and addiction. Call today to talk with a Christian counselor.

By Dan Blair

Emotions During the School Year

Children's emotions reflect how secure they feel in their world. Parents concerned with how well their children are learning in school should be aware of their children's emotions. But how to know if the emotions are expressing unusual stress or concern? You have to know what "normal" for the school year is. Anything besides the "norm" should be considered as a warning sign that the child is having trouble at school.

School Year Roller Coaster Emotions

Students are excited to return to school. Most are excited because they are in a new grade with new teachers and were promoted (rarely is anyone held back any more). That excitement has less to do with learning (task completion) than to seeing their friends again. School is a very social environment!

The excitement quickly wanes during September when most of the work is review of past work (elementary) or relatively easily done (few assignments for middle and high school except math which always has daily assignments). By October, students have had homework assignments, quizzes and tests in the computer/record book; the grade distribution begins to settle into place. Students with poor work habits and/or skills mastery have poor grades; students with strong work ethic and/or skills mastery have good grades. Back to school nights and parent conferences usually begin in October when progress grades come out. Students begin to settle into the routines and look forward to holidays.

The end of October brings Halloween - an exciting time for K-6 students because of the anticipation surrounding candy and (where available) the scary mansion trips. The latter is especially attractive to upper elementary and middle school students. High school students usually don't care about Halloween.

It takes about a week to recover from the sugar highs and November begins building for the holiday season. The first 3 weeks of November work and emotions are mostly stable (other than sugar influences). The 4th week is Thanksgiving vacation, so the week is short and workloads are lighter. Excitement prevails between Thanksgiving and winter break - usually about 3 weeks long. Final grades are due out during the time in most districts, so high school and middle school students often feel pressure. Tempers flare easily because there is less self-control. Additional difficulties happen when the weather is changing during this time (yes, weather fronts DO make a BIG difference in behaviors!).

By the 3rd week in December, emotions are high with anticipation, but school work is definitely NOT on the students' minds, regardless of age. Primary children work best because they don't have the concept of vacation approaching and Christmas almost there. Many high schools have final exams before break which puts more pressure (resulting in acting out behavior) on the students who aren't doing so well.

January is a calm month. The students are glad to be back with their friends after break and there are no major demands on them. In most parts of the country the weather is lousy, so they might as well be in school. Martin Luther King holiday is so close to winter break, it usually doesn't register on their minds why they have a day off. The routine is back and students work well. Late January/early February again brings parent conferences; accountability for grades may escalate students' acting out or resisting behaviors. Presidents' Day is a welcome break and everyone looks forward to it but without much anticipation.

Mid-February through spring break (at end of March to mid-April) is the "meat" of the school year when there are no interruptions (other than a report card) and the routine is solid. Heavy assignments (reports/essays) may be given to high school students during this time period. Spring break is a very welcome relief for everyone.

Unfortunately, after spring break students minds are not on academics. The weather is turning better in most places and a welcome respite from being confined for 4-6 months. Sometimes districts will have another round of parent conferences when progress/report card grades are out.

Late spring is also when most states do their state testing; although some states begin as early as November, the "big push" for high scores is in the spring. Teachers pressure students to do well, work hard, pay attention, use strategies they have been taught, and most do. Teachers may also be racing to present information they think might be on the tests (mostly at middle and secondary levels). During testing, schools often give students snacks and require halls to be "extra quiet". Pressure is on students to comply and perform well. This pressure often brings out the worst in many, because they know they can't do well and/or tolerate the pressure. When the testing sessions are done, they "rejoice" quite vocally and actively.

Students take the state tests anywhere between mid-April and late May. The school year may end at the end of May or the middle of June. As far as students are concerned, when state tests are done, they are done. Attitudes toward school and assignments are poor and grades start to decline. Good weather only exacerbates their attitudes, because they are looking forward to summer vacation. Those who have fallen behind either give up entirely or try to race to submit overdue work (these are usually the athletes who want to be eligible for fall sports next year). The last week of school is a trying time for teachers and students alike; everyone wants it done with, but completions have to happen. High school and some middle schools have final exams during the last week. Seniors usually have theirs done a week before everyone else so they can be released from school early (graduation practice being the rationale from limiting those who will disrupt the entire school with pranks, cutting classes, shouting and horse playing in the halls).

Relief and joy are the last week of school. It is over and vacation is ahead. It will resume the same cycle the next year.

All children can succeed in school. Parents can help their children by teaching the foundational skills that schools presume children have. Without the foundation for schools' academic instruction, children needlessly struggle and/or fail. Their future becomes affected because they then believe they are less than others, not able to succeed or achieve or provide for themselves or their families. Visit http://parentsteachkids.com to learn how to directly help your child and http://easyschoolsuccess.com to learn what is needed for education reform efforts to be successful.

By Jennifer Little

Teaching Gratitude and Thankfulness

Parents Teach Gratitude and Thankfulness

Parents usually want to spoil their children and give them gifts. There is nothing wrong with that. They want their child to never lack for anything (as much as they can afford it) and have what others seem to have. They love their children and one way they demonstrate that love is to give the children gifts or experiences.

There is an imbedded problem in these gifts and experiences. When parents constantly give children toys, clothing, and/or privileges, they are not teaching their children a valuable lesson. The children not only don't understand the costs and sacrifices parents have made for them but also they develop attitudes of entitlement (the opposite of thankfulness and gratitude).

Teaching thankfulness and gratitude is not actually taught directly. It is taught by adults who model the behaviors. Parents can consistently (that is the key) reinforce gratitude and thankfulness, like many social traits, at home with their children. They do this by showing the behaviors they want their children to demonstrate. The behaviors need to be 24/7, 365 a year, for the lessons to "sink in".

Special occasions are not the only times for gratitude and thankfulness. Why can't the parent thank the child for his/her behavior towards someone else, while shopping for dinner, for showing care and concern to a sibling, etc.? Why can't the parent express gratitude for the child's existence, kindness, concerns toward him/her as well as siblings and/or others such as strangers? Why can't the parent thank the child for thinking of someone other than him/herself?

Words of praise and gratitude go a long way to both bond the child closer to the adults as well as teaching appropriate behaviors. What kind of words? How about something like these examples:

    * You are such a good helper! Thank you for what you've done today.
    * I really appreciate all your help. It has made my day easier and happier.
    * You did such a good job of (......chore/task.....). I'm grateful that you were able to do that for me.
    * I'm grateful I have such a wonderful, thoughtful child.
    * Look at how well you've done that job! You are getting so grown up and I know others will appreciate you as much as I do.

Different Ages, Different Skills

Preschoolers generally do not have the developmental awareness of others' emotions/points of view or that other people may not have as much as they have. It is up to the parents to "open their eyes" to such concepts. Young children need to learn to share with others in ways that emotionally impact them. They could choose a gift to be given to a needy child during the holiday season.

Perhaps parents could, with their older children, volunteer at soup kitchens or events for the homeless or disadvantaged. For children to understand that they have more than others, they need to see that others have less than they do, perhaps even by having children clean out their toys for those outgrown or not used and donate them to centers themselves.

In some families, before holidays and birthdays, the children "make room" for the new. When gifts came unexpectedly, the children had to release equal (or more) numbers of items to others before they could keep what had just been given. This approach has another hidden agenda: cutting down on the clutter of unwanted, unused or grown out of toys and clothing stashed in closets. Cleaning out the closets makes the task the child's task rather than the adult's task. The child has the responsibility of emotionally valuing and separating from the toys and clothing. It prevents the child from stashing "stuff" to have "just in case" or for other "security" reasons.

Critical Life Skills

Parents want their children to be liked, accepted and valued by other children and adults. The quickest way to social acceptance, friendships and being important to others is to value the others aloud. Friends appreciating each other become very close friends. These relationships, parent-child and child-peers, become the foundation for the child's future relationships: employer-employee, marriage/significant other, and later on the child becomes the parent in his/her own parent-child relationships.

Your child's future is in your hands, depends on your willingness to teach him/her, and the emotional bonds your create with him/her. You are the model for your child's behavior. Be thankful and grateful for your child, because that child stretches your own heart with love shared.

All children can succeed in school. Parents can help their children by teaching the foundational skills that schools presume children have. Without the foundation for schools' academic instruction, children needlessly struggle and/or fail. Their future becomes affected because they then believe they are less than others, not able to succeed or achieve or provide for themselves or their families. Visit http://parentsteachkids.com to learn how to directly help your child and http://easyschoolsuccess.com to learn what is needed for education reform efforts to be successful.

By Jennifer Little

Finding a Good Teen Modelling Agency - Using the Internet to Help

If you're a teenager interested in becoming a model, the most obvious course of action is to find yourself a good teen modelling agency to represent you. While it's possible to enjoy success as a freelance teenage model, going through a proper teen modelling agency will save you a lot of time, hassle and energy - the latter of which you'll need plenty of if you want to become a teen model!

The internet has made it much easier to search for an agency, but it's advisable to approach your searches with a degree of caution. While it's most likely that you'll find an agency that works in accordance with the law (there is legislation in place to protect minors in the workplace) and offers a professional standard of service, there are still some unscrupulous agencies out there that promise modelling work in exchange for exorbitant set-up fees. If you find an agency that wants to charge the earth for a few quick portfolio snaps, be very wary before you (or your parents) hand over any cash. Also view any small ads in the papers with suspicion - a real and well-managed agency would rarely advertise their services though this medium.

A More Effective Teen Modelling Agency Service

The internet has provided one key advantage in regards to modelling which helps many teenagers who want to become a model break into the market more effectively. Many agencies now use online portfolios to help their clients view potential teenage models for their castings and contracts much more efficiently, as well as offering a worldwide stage on which to display your teen modelling skills. Your portfolio is one of the most vital pieces of equipment that you'll need to become a teenage model, but don't worry about rushing out to find a photographer just yet! If they think you've got what it takes, your agency will organise a professional photo session for you to help you create an impressive portfolio, which you can use in both hard copy form and on the internet.

Using the Internet to Research a Modelling Agency

Another thing worth bearing in mind when looking for a modelling agency is that the internet makes it very easy to conduct your own additional research to help you find out more about the modelling agency you're interested in. You could try looking for the modelling agency's name and see if you can find any credits on modelling contracts and projects. You can even take this one step further and look for forums where other teenage models may have posted to talk of their experiences with that particular teen modelling agency; you may find glowing recommendations or terrible warnings - but whichever way it falls, at least you'll have a much better idea about how they operate and whether they're worth working with.

La Mode Model Advice http://www.lamodemodeladvice.co.uk/

By Tanya Riley

Help Your Kids and Teens Eat a Healthy, Nutritious Diet for Improved Self Esteem and Well Being

Sometimes we wonder why kids can be lethargic, unmotivated, learning poorly or not retaining information or just plain unhappy. Diet is a major factor in the behavior and emotions of our children, just as it is with adults. You know how bad certain foods can make you feel when you eat them, and think of the effects they have on growing children. A growing child should be fed healthy, nutritious, quality food, organic whenever possible.

Coloring dyes, additives, preservatives, too much sugar and unhealthy fat have all shown in studies that they can have dramatic effects on behaviors, emotions and the health of children and teens, even causing allergies in some instances that can manifest as behavioral issues and disease. While "nutrition therapy" is considered an alternative treatment in our mainstream society, diet and healthy eating should actually be a primary focus for concerned parents who want to alleviate problems before they even start, in addition to healthy eating for the sake of it helping a child be and feel at his best. Often, healthy, happy kids have an extremely clean eating style (aka no junk).

Childhood obesity has become epidemic in our society due to our unhealthy eating and fast-food lifestyle many subscribe to. In addition to the problems already stated above, overweight children are often victims of bullies, low self esteem and negative self talk, which often leads to comfort eating and overeating to soothe the hurt. This quite often evolves into full blown food addiction. It is truly a vicious cycle that often begins as an innocent coping mechanism when stress relief techniques are not taught or are unknown to parents, teachers and role models.

You may find that your whole family needs to begin eating healthy, not just the kids. If you live a typical fast food lifestyle where restaurants cook the majority of your family's meals, then change is needed for the health and well being of everyone. Change does not have to be drastic but by implementing small changes one at a time, before you know it, everyone in the family will be healthier and happier for it. While eating out may seem like a needed break, the health impact of doing so regularly are severe and tend to cause weight gain in most people due to the added fats and sugars in restaurant foods.

What can you do?

First, cut out the soda pop. Soda is one of the worst culprits for too much sugar, colors and empty calories. Soda contributes to weight gain and keeping weight on. Start replacing soda and other sugar filled beverages with water and seltzer water. The body needs water to flush out toxins and to stay healthy. Of course we have all heard that we need 8-10 glasses of water a day, but how close do your children come to that amount? How close do you come to that? If you are making the transition from soda to water, you may want to try cutting seltzer water with a bit of vanilla extract, a splash of cream and ¼ t. stevia (natural sweetener) to create a homemade vanilla cream soda that is delicious and cures the craving for soda.

Eat meals at home. You can easily master the art of the Crockpot which you can launch in the morning and have a wonderful home cooked meal waiting for everyone at dinnertime. Set the table and eat together as a family. Make sure you add your veggies or a big salad to whatever Crockpot dish you choose to cook. A savvy health conscious parent may have their Crockpot on every single day to ensure that the whole family is getting "slow food" that's healthy and ready for them when they need it.

Eat meals together. Surprisingly only 28% of American families eat dinner together at the dinner table. Sitting down and enjoying a family meal is not only good for family bonding and closeness, it's good for digestion and is almost always more nutritious than restaurant meal choices. Eating on the run is never healthy. Make sure your family gets to sit down and eat as a family as often as possible, preferably every night.

Make sure you introduce new fruits and vegetables to your children as often as possible. Get adventurous and learn to cook or slice new foods and experiment! Kids love novel things, and although they may get into the rut of preferring to eat only what they know and like, as a loving parent, you should repeatedly introduce the same new food to your child often until they get used to it. While it may not be their favorite, and you should never force any type of food.. several presentations and asking them to try "just a few bites" will help them explore new textures and flavors, in addition to giving them more nutrients and vitamins than are available in a child-imposed limited menu.

If you are a role model for healthy eating and encourage your child and teen to make healthy food choices along with you, establishing a baseline of healthy eating in youth, children will always come back to what is natural and healthy, because it feels so good. As they get older and realize the impact of any unhealthy food choices they make, they will remember your wise attitude and instruction concerning food.

Present fruits of veggies as a snack instead of junk foods. Of course kids will go for ice creams or pastries or cookies if that's what they are used too. But instead, stock your home with healthy choices that kids love, such as apples with almond butter, celery with cream cheese, freshly made air popped popcorn, apples, bananas with raisins and yogurt, or plain full fat yogurt sweetened with honey and fresh blueberries. All these suggestions are healthy and kids love them! They are also more economical than a box of grocery store cookies.

Over processed foods are linked to feelings of depression, which is one more reason to transition into wholesome natural foods. Healthy eating naturally makes a child feel great due to the high quality of nutrition available in natural wholesome foods and low sugar and fat content. A healthy child or teen feels good about himself too and this healthy self-esteem and confidence spills over into all areas of life.

No parent is perfect, but we must try to help our children learn the basics of healthy eating for their health and well being. We are responsible for what we buy at the grocery store or local famer's market, not our children. When healthy food is in the house, healthy food will be eaten. Make it fun and ask your children to help with the preparation. When everyone has a hand in the pot, everyone has fun, and healthy eating becomes your family's way. Bon Appetite!

Mellisa Dormoy is the founder of ShambalaKids Relaxation CD's for kids and teens. Mellisa specializes in guided imagery and children's self-esteem.

You can find more information about Mellisa and her work at http://www.ShambalaKids.com

By Mellisa Dormoy

Time Management For Students: Getting The Balance Right

It's the start of the new school year and this is the time for you to know more on how to manage your time.

Finding the right study-life balance is not as difficult as you think. There are simple but effective ways to keep you organized, get good grades and still have time to hang out with your friends.

Do a time audit:

Get a notebook and jot down how many hours you spend for each of activity that you do in a day. A time audit will make you aware how you're using your time and whether there are some activities that you need to keep and some that you need to drop.

One of the major time sucks is the mindless use of Internet - for net surfing, chatting, playing games. But if you like spending time online, then why don't you use your broadband connection to get better grades? Avail yourself of online tutorial services so that you can finally ace your algebra and chemistry exams.

Study ahead of time:

You need more time to review and absorb your lessons and finish your projects. When you study ahead of time, you get a higher chance of retaining the lessons that you learned. You also want the luxury of relaxing a day before the major exam. This is essential as only a clear and focused mind will help you figuring out that knotty math problem..

Know yourself:

It's important to know and accept your capabilities so that you will know how much time you need to absorb a particular lesson. Don't get frustrated when you have difficulty learning a certain course subject. That only means that you can finish the easier courses first and then use the remaining time for studying the more difficult subjects.

Get a tutor to help you:

There are just some subjects that perplex you. This, despite the huge amount of time and effort you give to your homework and reviewing for your exams. Work on this weakness by getting yourself a tutor who will provide you with one-to-one teaching and guide you in every step of the learning process. Your parents don't have to bust their budget to get the best tutor. There are several companies that provide high quality online tutorial services at affordable rates. And an online tutor may be the better option if you and your parents are busy because you cab access the online tutor anytime and anywhere with an Internet connection.

Learning how to manage and balance your schedule is perhaps the most important skill set that you need to hone even at early age. This will teach you to know your priorities and prepare you for the challenges that await you in college.

By Prime P Sarmiento

How to Help Your High Achieving Teens Cope With Stress

Stress management plays an important role in getting excellent school marks. It's important for high achieving students to deal with challenges even at a young age as this will prepare them for being go-getters in the future.

But it's these high achievers who can be subject to anxiety problems or get ill. They were often overwhelmed by hectic schedules and constant stress.

There are three things you can teach your child to help them deal with stress.

1.) Teach the value of focus

You can help your child cope with stress by helping her manage her time. This is a common problem for ambitious teens who want to score a spot in a top college and thus, in addition to getting As, are joining too may clubs for their own good.

Advise your child to limit her extracurricular activities to two. Ask her to choose what she liked most and do them well. Encourage her to her their own natural academic and extracurricular interests, and not bully her into being what you want her to be. For example, if your child has a natural inclination for music, encourage her to join a glee club and not force her to join the student council just because you think it's more prestigious to be elected student council president.

Assure your child that learning how to focus will keep her ahead of her peers as she had more time to perfect her craft.

You and your child can also create a timetable to manage her homework and do other tasks. By letting your child see how much activities she has to do in one day alone, she will realize why it's important to drop some things and keep a more relaxed schedule.

2.) Teach the value of reaching out

You don't need to do everything on your own. As a busy working woman, you must be undergoing a lot of stress as well because you also need to balance your responsibilities at home and in the office. This is why you may need to hire a private tutor to help with your child's homework and ensure that she maintains her good academic standing. Getting a tutor will also teach your child the value of reaching out to people - that she need not do everything by herself and asking for help, when needed, is not wrong.

Getting a private tutor is one investment that will benefit both you and your child. If you think a private tutor is beyond your budget (you need to pay at least $50 per hour) then get your child an online tutor. Reputable companies offer high quality online tutorial services at half of what a private tutor charges and your child will also get all the personal attention that she needs anytime as long as there's an Internet connection.

3.) Teach the value of positive attitude

You and your child need to be more optimistic. Instead of focusing on what will happen if your child's grades suddenly drop or if she won't get elected as president of the math club, you need to put your attention on how she will achieve her goal. Tell her that you and your family will support her and cheer for her no matter what.

Don't scare your child into them into following your master plan for academic and career success. You assure them that you love and admire them for who they are and not for their school achievements.

At the end of the day, a solid family foundation is the best way to keep your child happy, secure and put her on top of her game.

Prime is a content management strategist for Ahead Interactive (AI) - leading provider of live, video-powered online tutorials. AI is the international arm of Ahead Learning Systems - one of Asia's leading chain of tutorial and review centers.

By Prime P Sarmiento

Is Raising Kids Becoming a List of Dos and Don'ts For You?

Raising children is not easy. All parents know that. Each new day brings a new set of challenges and problems along with the immense pleasures and joys of parenthood. Both go hand in hand - problems and pleasures.

But many a time parents end up looking at their job of raising kids as a matter of Dos and Don'ts. The child finds himself stuck with a list of Dos and Don'ts, which may not always make sense to him but he knows if he fails to follow the work list, he is going to have a hard time from his parents.

Disciplining the child is good and necessary for developing good habits, values and character. But over discipline to the point of instilling fear in the child's mind can prove detrimental.

I am listing here a few useful tips for parenting to help parents understand how far to go when dealing with child behavior and where to draw the line:

Yelling doesn't solve anything

At times, your child's behavior problems can get on your nerves. Most parents end up yelling at their children, not because they want to, but because they feel that is the only way the child is going to listen to them. This is a myth.

The child does not listen to you because she understands what is being said is for her own good. She listens to you from fear of being yelled at. In other words, the lesson you are trying to hand down to your child, gets lost in all the noise and fury. On the contrary, your wrath creates a psychological barrier in the child.

If you constantly yell at your child for every little thing, you are subjecting her to emotional abuse which can be as damaging as physical abuse. Over a period of time, children become used to yelling and they start to tune it out whenever you yell at them. In short, yelling or screaming at your children to discipline them becomes totally ineffective. On the contrary, children begin to display aggression, feel frustrated and develop animosity toward their parents' abusive behavior.

Advice for parents: Put yourself in your child's shoes

So how do you make him listen? Place yourself in your child's shoes and try to view the world from their point of view. Would you like being yelled at for every little folly? Wouldn't you rather have someone explain to you what mistake you made, what harm it caused and what good would have happened if you had done the something the proper way?

It is quite simple, really. Children are not stupid, they have very intelligent, receptive minds and they understand everything. Explain to your child, gently and firmly, the gravity of the mistake she made and what she could have achieved by handling it differently or modifying how she dealt with the situation. Once your child understands the missed opportunity and the responsibility of doing things right, you will find your child will remember the lesson for a very long time.

Do not insult your child

Insulting your child in front of others, especially other children, can be hugely damaging to the child's psychology. If you are unhappy that your child is not getting good grades in school, then talk to him about the importance of studying, help him realize his capabilities and motivate him to do better. Insulting or shaming your child can have adverse effects on the child and such children usually suffer from low self-esteem and lack of confidence.

The simple but effective parents' tips you can follow include:

   1. Create a regular routine for studies, playtime, meals, bedtime and other activities. Following a regular routine will help your child learn to manage time. But before expecting your child to follow a timetable, make sure you follow one yourself.

   2. Try to be around for help and guidance when your child is studying or doing homework. Your presence as a parent is highly motivating for your child, especially young children who feel confident when their mom or dad is around during study time.

   3. Do not overly praise your child in front of others or insult her in front of others. Rather let others praise your child for good behavior or school performance. When your child finds others praising her in front of her delighted parents, her confidence and morale will receive a boost from the feeling of making her parents happy. For most children, making their parents happy is the primary objective. So let your child know what makes you happy by keeping open a regular channel of friendly communication.

To ensure good parenting, spend quality time with your children. Go to watch children's movies together, make it a habit to read bedtime stories to your child or watch motivating videos that help children develop character and values and overcome their behavior problems. Raising children is not easy. But parenthood definitely is the most joyous experience.

By Noah B Brown

How to Connect With and Encourage Your Teen

The teenage years are transitional. We sit back and watch the volatility as our teens come to terms with growing up. Hormones and emotions run high. From a teen perspective, your child is trying to make sense out of all he has learned. He seems to be searching for himself and perhaps trying on many different 'selves' at the same time. The one gift you can give your teen is to help him or her understand that life is not about finding himself. Rather, life is all about creating himself.

As parents, we worry about our children's future. Sometimes conflict can develop as we hold out a standard that is a reflection of our own goals, rather than our teen's goals. If we respect our own parental limits and see our role as a guide rather than imposing, we ease our parental grip and allow our teen to enjoy more freedom as appropriate.

The teen years are a time for guidance. Provided that your teen has a solid sense of self, and healthy self esteem, he or she will undoubtedly want to pursue many interests and passions. That is a healthy, natural and creative expression of self and discovering more of what life has to offer. As parents, we can support this by encouraging our child, by listening and giving advice when asked.

Although we may not always be in agreement with choices of hair color or clothing styles, making concessions in this way allows your teen to feel more freedom and in control of his own life. Therefore he'll be less likely to turn to more destructive means of expression or attention getting.

Just as adults, teens need to feel they matter. They need to understand that what they think, feel and do are important to you and to the world. You can help your teen understand this by spending quality time together and truly getting to know your child. Ask your teen what he or she enjoys and wants to do, and then do it together. Don't force anything, but let it flow. Teens thrive in an environment of respect, love and understanding.

As you encourage your teen to pursue healthy passions and you personally get involved with these interests as well, you will electrify your relationship with your teen. Few things create stronger bonds than sharing fun, interesting times and conversation. If your teen needs help in discovering passions, then help! Visit places, study a language, play basketball, be encouraging - connect with your child and help him or her explore all the wonders of life.

Your teen can literally choose any future he or she wants. The creative processes of life are only halted by mental barriers we personally put up. So armed with this knowledge, encourage your teen to actively pursue healthy interests. Be present to support and encourage, and give advice when needed. Honor and respect your teen's individual choices even if they are different from your own. Above all, nurture your teen's passions by getting involved and being excited about their lives and all of life's possibilities.

Mellisa Dormoy is the founder of ShambalaKids Relaxation CD's for kids and teens. Mellisa specializes in guided imagery and children's and teen self-esteem.

You can find more information about Mellisa and her work, including more articles and resources at: http://www.ShambalaKids.com

By Mellisa Dormoy

Modelling for Teenagers - Things to Think About Before You Start

Modelling for teenagers can be a lucrative career, leading to regular modelling work up and into adulthood - but if your son or daughter is interested in teen modelling work, there are a few things you should think about and discuss with them first.

This career can be an exhilarating experience; teen modelling can be an exciting adventure, full of new people, places and a healthy income. Unfortunately, modelling can also be testing, with knock backs, rejections and long, exhausting days. As a teenage model's parent, you will need to be prepared to support them through and some tough times - or conversely, be ready to accompany them on many castings and photo shoots!

Modelling For Teenagers - A Package Deal

Modelling for teenagers is the only sector of the industry where the model comes as part of a package; your teenage model will be required to have a chaperone with them at all times during auditions and jobs - so as their legal guardian, you'll need to be willing and able to travel around the country (or possibly even the world) with them, in order to help them enjoy success in their teenage modelling career.

You'll also need to give your blossoming teenage model plenty of emotional support and maybe even help with their accounts - modelling for teenagers, like any other type of modelling, will incur costs and if your teenage model is old enough to have left education, as a self-employed person, expenses such as travelling to shoots can be offset against their tax bill. If this applies to your teenage model, then you'll need to help them keep a record of these costs and all earnings. If, for your child, modelling for teenagers turns into adult modelling, this will be a necessity throughout their career, and will be good practice for them. A professional accountant can help you with their end of year tax returns.

Modelling for Teenagers - Other Considerations

When it comes to any type of modelling, for teenagers or otherwise, there are a few other essential things you need to consider before you go ahead. Your teenage model will need; a healthy diet and regular exercise regime; to have good hair, teeth and skin; to be tall, slim and well toned and be able to smile and appear happy, even if they're tired and fed up!

Perhaps the most important thing is to be realistic about whether they fit the ideal teenage model image and have the personality and thick skin required to succeed. It's one thing to be pretty or handsome, but when it comes to modelling for teenagers, there will be a combination of different elements that a modelling agency will be looking out for - therefore, it's worth researching their criteria beforehand, to avoid putting your child into a situation that could cause them disappointment unnecessarily.

Finally, be prepared for it to take time and patience. Many teenage models attend many castings before they land their first job in the 'modelling for teenagers' world - but it's worth pursuing if you think they've really got what it takes to become a teenage model.

La Mode Model Advice http://www.lamodemodeladvice.co.uk/

By Tanya Riley

Separation Anxiety and Returning to School

Separation anxiety is one of my favorite topics, probably because I experienced so much separation anxiety as a child. I really connect to children in this area, and love to be advocates for their hearts.

The following quote fits in beautifully: "Be satisfied with what is, while you're reaching for more." (Author Unknown)

So many times, because we want our kids to be strong and successful, we expect more out of them than they are able or willing to give in a particular situation or moment (reaching for more). This causes us to miss important cues that have a subtle and very profound impact on their lives. In wanting them to be able to move forward and make it through difficult times, we sometimes forget to fully connect our heart to theirs, to meet them where they truly are (being satisfied with what is).

As our children return to school, take time to be sensitive to the fact that they are experiencing both excitement and stress in their little minds and bodies, just like we are. Look for harmony, not perfection. How do we create that? This is a time of change for all of us, and we need transition time. Your children may need some additional connecting time in order to make the leap. Be sensitive to their hearts.

It is not a bad thing when our kids want to be close, as they are being pulled out into the world. It is perfectly normal that they would want to stay close to you. You are "home" for them, and a safe haven. Be there for them. That is so important. This creates trust. Find out what being there for them looks like to them. Do some extra planning for those first few days, making room for flexibility.

If the teacher says, "Just leave. He'll be fine." Consider how true that is for your child. Who knows your child better? You do. Yes, children get over being left against their will. It happens every day. They settle in and life goes on. However... and this is a BIG however...what happens to their heart, to their trust, and to their spirit? They need to know they are safe and loved, and that mom and dad are there for them when they need it, not just when mom or dad think they need it. Big distinction.

I know there are different schools of thought on this subject. This is simply my opinion. What I can tell you, is that being flexible with my kids during these transition times has really paid off. They TRUST me. They know when they are in a situation that is difficult or uncomfortable, that I will not sneak off while they are not looking. They know that I walk into a classroom as their mom and their advocate, and I never take that hat off. They can always count on me.

Go with your gut, your instinct, your intuition. You know your child better than anyone else. Feel their heart. Go back to your childhood. Experience the first days of school, and then give your children your love, your listening ear, and your heart. Communicate with your children in advance. That helps a lot. What does he/she need in order to be able to stay and thrive? That is what you need to come to an agreement on.

The amazing gift in all of this is that when we give them more room to experience these events, feelings and fears, and we show up by their side along the way, their level of trust in us and in themselves strengthens. Their self-confidence strengthens. They retain their wholeness, as opposed to growing up wounded in their heart. This is a beautiful gift for every child.

Traci Carman is the Founder and CEO of A Loving Way ~ How I Parent Makes a Difference. She is a Parenting Coach, Speaker and Author. She is also the creator of the "Who I Am" Energy Cards. For more information about her mission, philosophy and parenting services, or to sign up for her free monthly Newsletter, visit her at http://www.alovingway.com. You may also reach her at 800-647-1171 or tracicarman@alovingway.com.

By Traci Carman

So You Aren't Happy With the Teacher?

Personality

Because teachers are people, there is always a "personality factor" when considering teachers for children. After dealing with parental requests (made at the end of the previous year or over the summer) and prior teachers' recommendations, administrators (elementary) take the "personality factor" into consideration when assigning children to teachers' classrooms. The interactions of the "personality factor" may include any of the following:

  • · Child and teacher,
  • · Child and other children in the class,
  • · Teacher and total class interaction dynamics,
  • · Child's (dis)respect for adults and/or gender,
  • · Child's manipulation of parents citing teacher issues (children DO lie about what happens at school),
  • · Teacher's management styles and instructional strengths,
  • · Parental perceptions of the teacher.

Talking With the Teacher

Suppose you think that the teacher is not doing his/her job. To start with, don't assume the teacher isn't doing his/her job. This will set up an adversarial relationship. Teachers are doing their jobs. There are many restrictions on what they can and cannot do, what they are to teach and even sometimes when they can teach particular content/process. States mandate all of this through standards (published on each state's website) so parents know what is being taught. Teachers dedicate more than the school day to their job; typically, teachers work an average of 3-4 hours/day longer than their instructional day. It may seem that (s)he is not doing the job, but there are many factors aspects of the job that parents never see or know about.

Talking With Administrators

When making complaints to the principal, parents need to be logical and demonstrate that they have tried to work with the teacher regarding the issue they are complaining about; usually email records and telephone conversation logs are sufficient. This documentation helps support those complaints. Parents need to understand that the teacher may also be maintaining documentation logs. The complaints should be based on facts, not emotional reactions or children's statements (these are very unreliable in many instances when children bear some/all responsibility for difficulties).

The Child Isn't Learning

When parents complain that their child isn't learning from the teacher, it may or may not be true. The administrator can talk with the teacher. Often the problem is that the child doesn't have the prerequisite skills (from previous grades' content/processes) for what the teacher must cover; the teacher is aware that the child is not learning. Guaranteed, the teacher is concerned and has probably already discussed this concern with the previous teacher and/or the administrator.

Talking With the Child About School

When the parent talks to their child about their experience they should ask questions about where they sit in class (proximity to the board and/or instructional area), what they are learning, what their homework assignments are, etc. They also need to ask about other children in the class, who they sit next to, who helps or hinders attention and task completion, who their friends are and why they are their friends, who does (not) get in trouble and what the trouble was about.

Parents Can Help

Parents can fill in the learning gap. Parents need to know what skills the child is missing in order to do the current work. Typically children have difficulties with paying attention or focusing on instruction and/or their work. They may need to eliminate the possibilities of learning problems with the child; assessment for special education and/or ancillary services will address this concern. Please see our website for much more information about this topic (home page, how we can help, assessments and parent modules).

Options of Other Schools

When considering moving classrooms or moving schools all together,parents need to remember that they can't make that decision alone. They can request a different teacher (preferably before assignments are made), but that request may not be honored for many reasons. Administrators must consider class size, social interactions with other students, personality issues, etc. When trying to move to a different school, different issues (such as bus transportation or availability of special or ancillary services) may affect the outcome. If the parent tries to move his/her child to another school district without physically moving into their service district, it then becomes an issue of funding and district level decisions for inter-district transfers must be made.

All children can succeed in school. Parents can help their children by teaching the foundational skills that schools presume children have. Without the foundation for schools' academic instruction, children needlessly struggle and/or fail. Their future becomes affected because they then believe they are less than others, not able to succeed or achieve or provide for themselves or their families. Visit http://parentsteachkids.com to learn how to directly help your child and http://easyschoolsuccess.com to learn what is needed for education reform efforts to be successful.

By Jennifer Little

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