By Jennifer Little
Very young children idolize their parents, because parents provide everything for them. Parents seem to know everything and are omnipotent. Older children rarely think about choosing a role model. What they do think about are "heroes", the fantastic beings with superhuman powers who rescue or save those in trouble. Pre-teens and adolescents think about the seemingly superhuman possibilities among sports, movie and music stars, because they envision the glamor, media hype and luxurious lifestyles that exist only in the child's fantasies.
Fantasy role models are just that: fantasies. They are not people who can function in the world with the more limited talents or skills the rest of us have. Role models are people we can hope to emulate, to pattern our lives after, to mimic at times when we hope to gain similar skills. The rich and famous are insulated from the "daily grind" of having to pay rent, utilities, costs for food, clothing and transportation.
The problem is that most children or adolescents consciously choose their role models. Typically, children either grow up to be just like one of their parents or determined to be totally unlike either or both of their parents. Their parent or parents become the role models of what they refuse to be like. Unfortunately, most children and teenagers are limited in people who could be role models for them. They are in contact with family members, neighbors, and school personnel.
Children and adolescents learn to develop the social skills to fit in with others. Adults become people to remove as influences from their lives. Wise adolescents begin to think about careers they might want to have as an adult. They find people in those occupations and talk with them, find out what the educational requirements are, the specific demands and skills for the career, and opportunities that may be similar in nature. They learn about how well their interests and skills fit with those particular jobs.
Many adolescents and young adults will observe those who are socially skilled, well-liked by peers and adults, and mimic their mode of dress, speech patterns, and/or interests. By seeming to copy those individuals, they are actually "trying on" skills to determine whether or not those skills "fit" with them as individuals.
Those who do not emulate others or think about possible career options will struggle when they leave high school and/or college. They do not have any goals, so there is nothing for them to work toward achieving. They waste time and resources. While this may not seem important to someone 16, 20 or 25 years of age, it becomes important later (when they are 30 or 35 years of age) if they have not early-on achieved some of the foundational steps for acquiring a job with potential for advancement into a career that can support them well.
Role models are more than "heroes". They are people who show us the skills and know-how of achieving responsible lives, performing work to benefit others as well as earn a living. They are people who demonstrate what is possible for us, individually and as sub-groups in society. They are people who teach us how to solve problems that can seem insurmountable, how to make good decisions, and live productive lives surrounded by others whom we value, love and respect.
Role models are people who give others hope of overcoming obstacles in their lives and achieve goals they set or modified so they could achieve them. The sooner children or adolescents determine who their role models are, the less time they waste and the sooner they can meet all the requirements for the goals they establish for themselves.
Jennifer Little, Ph.D.
All children can succeed in school. Parents can help their children by teaching the foundational skills that schools presume children have. Without the foundation for schools' academic instruction, children needlessly struggle and/or fail. Their future becomes affected because they then believe they are less than others, not able to succeed or achieve or provide for themselves or their families. Visit http://parentsteachkids.com to learn how to directly help your child and http://easyschoolsuccess.com to learn what is needed for education reform efforts to be successful.
Very young children idolize their parents, because parents provide everything for them. Parents seem to know everything and are omnipotent. Older children rarely think about choosing a role model. What they do think about are "heroes", the fantastic beings with superhuman powers who rescue or save those in trouble. Pre-teens and adolescents think about the seemingly superhuman possibilities among sports, movie and music stars, because they envision the glamor, media hype and luxurious lifestyles that exist only in the child's fantasies.
Fantasy role models are just that: fantasies. They are not people who can function in the world with the more limited talents or skills the rest of us have. Role models are people we can hope to emulate, to pattern our lives after, to mimic at times when we hope to gain similar skills. The rich and famous are insulated from the "daily grind" of having to pay rent, utilities, costs for food, clothing and transportation.
The problem is that most children or adolescents consciously choose their role models. Typically, children either grow up to be just like one of their parents or determined to be totally unlike either or both of their parents. Their parent or parents become the role models of what they refuse to be like. Unfortunately, most children and teenagers are limited in people who could be role models for them. They are in contact with family members, neighbors, and school personnel.
Children and adolescents learn to develop the social skills to fit in with others. Adults become people to remove as influences from their lives. Wise adolescents begin to think about careers they might want to have as an adult. They find people in those occupations and talk with them, find out what the educational requirements are, the specific demands and skills for the career, and opportunities that may be similar in nature. They learn about how well their interests and skills fit with those particular jobs.
Many adolescents and young adults will observe those who are socially skilled, well-liked by peers and adults, and mimic their mode of dress, speech patterns, and/or interests. By seeming to copy those individuals, they are actually "trying on" skills to determine whether or not those skills "fit" with them as individuals.
Those who do not emulate others or think about possible career options will struggle when they leave high school and/or college. They do not have any goals, so there is nothing for them to work toward achieving. They waste time and resources. While this may not seem important to someone 16, 20 or 25 years of age, it becomes important later (when they are 30 or 35 years of age) if they have not early-on achieved some of the foundational steps for acquiring a job with potential for advancement into a career that can support them well.
Role models are more than "heroes". They are people who show us the skills and know-how of achieving responsible lives, performing work to benefit others as well as earn a living. They are people who demonstrate what is possible for us, individually and as sub-groups in society. They are people who teach us how to solve problems that can seem insurmountable, how to make good decisions, and live productive lives surrounded by others whom we value, love and respect.
Role models are people who give others hope of overcoming obstacles in their lives and achieve goals they set or modified so they could achieve them. The sooner children or adolescents determine who their role models are, the less time they waste and the sooner they can meet all the requirements for the goals they establish for themselves.
Jennifer Little, Ph.D.
All children can succeed in school. Parents can help their children by teaching the foundational skills that schools presume children have. Without the foundation for schools' academic instruction, children needlessly struggle and/or fail. Their future becomes affected because they then believe they are less than others, not able to succeed or achieve or provide for themselves or their families. Visit http://parentsteachkids.com to learn how to directly help your child and http://easyschoolsuccess.com to learn what is needed for education reform efforts to be successful.
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